My father lying in the hospital
on what was soon to be his deathbed
turned to my wife with these words
Carroll I don't know what we did wrong
Stephen had every opportunity

Dear dad
I knew I'd disappointed you
with my meager accomplishments
my patchwork life

I remember at fifteen I told you
I thought for me it would be the guitar
and you said
if it were the piano or the violin
you might understand
but the guitar?
and besides how would I
make a living?

So I knew you took it hard
when I left school
and my first marriage
and then two more
though you were always
gracious and welcoming
of my new partners

Had I known you suffered
felt the least hint of responsability
for what you imagined
my deficiencies my failures
I'd have done more to share with you
the many gifts of this
amazing life I chose
an artist's path
guitarist, lutenist
in love with my slender
but demanding craft
which your own example
and achievements
made possible in so many ways
since it was from you I learned at last
to follow my heart's passion
even if that meant leaping off the train